when i'm with you,
my heart does not beat.
it drums and thuds and thumps
until i can feel it in my feet.
i walk with you everywhere
and hope you can feel every ache,
that you feel my blisters
bubble under your skin.
not so long ago,
my heart was just a pump,
functional, rational, steady.
now, it encompasses every thought.
i would like you to stay a while,
the longer you are here
i can be sure yours is drumming too.
although,
i doubt as much.
while i'm drowning in the blood
my heart has forgotten
how to control,
you are lost in your wit.
i am afraid that
you enjoy the idea that
you have ruined the
notions of my purely pumping heart
instead of the
idea of me.
and i'm alone,
i'm alone,
i'm alone,
i'm alone.