Aug 2018
You hate me,
don't you?
and I'm not pretty enough
to fight for,
I know
I'm sorry I could never be what you deserve
and maybe the saddest part
is that I could have been
if only I pushed myself harder
but then my face would be pressed so far into the ground
my bones would have broken
flesh would have peeled from my face
where
is the in-between
I've never lived it
But I know that,
That is where I would thrive
I dream of it,
It waltzes on my lips, between the folds of my never tired brain
And that place, I fear more than anything, is the one state
I'll never have the gas to get to
don't you?
and I'm not pretty enough
to fight for,
I know
I'm sorry I could never be what you deserve
and maybe the saddest part
is that I could have been
if only I pushed myself harder
but then my face would be pressed so far into the ground
my bones would have broken
flesh would have peeled from my face
where
is the in-between
I've never lived it
But I know that,
That is where I would thrive
I dream of it,
It waltzes on my lips, between the folds of my never tired brain
And that place, I fear more than anything, is the one state
I'll never have the gas to get to
The worst part is this is all in my head. The person had never really done or said anything to make me feel this way. It's just my own feelings of inadequacy.
Thinking more about it though, I wrote this about a current relationship, but the feelings were definitely old fears sparked by a past relationship (my first and longest to date).
Thinking more about it though, I wrote this about a current relationship, but the feelings were definitely old fears sparked by a past relationship (my first and longest to date).
