Dear uncle Adam
I can't express my disappointment
My heart aches
And I can't shake this awful feeling
You hurt us all and broke our hearts
When they say that it's the drugs
I feel no sympathy
I remember your smile
Your brightness
I remember your laugh
You would taunt and ****
I would laugh
I look at these pictures of us
And it hurts so deeply
I said I wanted you to die
But I don't
I feel you are already gone
Are you gone?
Is this just your ****** scumbag shell
Or are you still inside there screaming
Do you need help?
Do want help?
Do you wish to die?
Why did you abandoned
Why did you choose something so destructive
Why can't you see that we're here for you
Why don't you want to get better
Why don't you love us?
Why do I love you?
At one point I remember being excited to see you
I felt hopeful hugging you
Knowing I had someone on my side
I felt you understood me
But now i don't know
Now I feel you were never truthful
When I never judged you
I feel angry and stupid
I believed in you
I let you in my home and I wanted to take care of you
But you scare me now
You stuck a needle in your arm less than 4 feet away from your child and your niece and my child
And I tried to act like that's not what happened
But i can't be blind
I can't sympathize
Even though I know your life was rough
I still don't get it
I do
But I don't
And I wish I could
Because I miss you
I miss you smile
And your laugh
I miss your life
I don't want you to die
But I feel you are gone
Your son deserved more
You deserved more
We cant make it right for you
I so wish I could have
Please don't die
Please fight
Please
I miss you