Lately I've been longing for you. We spent a lot of time together in the four years we both have been here. I find the mistake I made, back then, and realize it is too late to tell you how connected to you I felt and how I wish I had chosen you. I see you no where around. I get no tasty morsel of your existence to keep me sane, and yet here I sit happy you are happy. You'll never know how much I miss you, because I can't say it. Pride inhibits me, and you are locked in a love that I'm sure suits you well. Just know, as a better version of myself, you made my 19th year and my 21st year the best they could have been. I will never forget you, because you were the first chemical connection I have ever experienced with another human. Who knows if it will happen again, if not you will be the one that got away. For now you are just out of reach, but the world knows where we will end. I just hope for me, you are a part of it.
I miss him, and I'm mad I ****** up. C'est la vie.