She asks how i do it.
How i love you with such a
fierosity
but also such an 'i dont care' tainted calm

I tell her its nothing
nothing of experience and
nothing of being 'prepared'
not something you learn from a book
but something you learn from love.

i love him with such a fire in my heart
that sometimes i choke in the smoke
and it leaves me breathless

when he runs his fingers up my thigh and
kisses me slowly
teasing me,
tainting my lips with the fresh taste of
strawberries and mint.

a fire brews in my belly
and as my eyes roll to the back of my brain
lulled in ecstacy and desire
and never quite being able to pull him close enough
to be satisfied

when i look in his eyes and see
passion
raw
*******
passion
as we make eachother lose ourselves
between the bedsheets we play between

when he texts me
how much he needs me
my lips
my hips
between his arms
in a dim winter morning
my heart skips a beat and the thought
of him
plagues my mind all ******* day.

i love him like a fire that is not phased by
rain
or tears
in fact we love stronger through it all.
for if i am gasoline he is the spark
that ignites us
and leaves us burning through the night.

but i love him calm too
calm like safety
a boat softly rocking on the horizon
under a starry night
where the moon shines for you
for me
for an us we indulge ourselves in

what we cant seem to accept
is the sheer fact of
we deserve this.
we
are
deserving
of
this
love

and what matters not is
how
or where
but ask away my love because i love feeling
like you cant believe how
******* ******* lucky we are
to have found a home
in such a broken place

i love him calm because
he fills the spaces of me
i believed would stay empty
but **** it feels good
to feel closer to whole

i love him calm because i know
i dont overwhelm him
as much as i overwhelm myself

i love him calm because
he is human
and deserving of everything
happy and free
and maybe
maybe
i can be that

loving him calm isnt about not caring
its not about the
'he can wait for now, im with you'
as its not out of care
its out of a pact to stay more in the moment
and i know he understands

he brings a calm to my chaos

he hasnt seen the best of me
but i love him calm because he
holds me close when i need him
and when i dont
and when i call him falling apart
he answers
tells me to stop apologising
reaches through the line to dry
the tears
cascading down my freckled cheek.

i love him calm because i
dont need to fight for his affection
or love
or attention
i love him calm because when i need
a break from those things
he does his best  

we're a fire and an ocean
we are the sum of the sun and sky
and we are both the thunder that rocks the earth
and the lightning that burns the sky bright

and i wouldnt change it for the world