Always the loser, never the star.
Always bullied, always ignored.
One day, he finds a SQUIP.
Says it'll help him be more chill.
Sound familiar? Here's the trick:

SQUIP is Keanu?
Well, who cares?
It will help,
Heere the Loser
Be more chill.

"That's... a girl's shirt."
Here, just follow my lead!
"So, come here often?"
"N-yes!"
Mr. Jeremy, just, say what I do!

"So, who is this chick?"
"Madeline Miller. She's... French."
"No she isn't, she just fakes it!"
Nice going Hamlet. Be more chill.

It's suddenly Halloween.
How'd it go by so quick?
Seems like just yesterday,
He'd been ignored.

Suddenly, he wasn't so forgotten.
He has a girlfriend,
Who loves him for him.
Her best friend though-
Is on a mission.

What happened at the party?
Some may ask.
It's complicated, though,
I'll tell you a flash.

Chloe kissed Jeremy.
Then did Jake,
Christine lost Jake.
And...

"Rich set a fire!"
"He knew he was gay!"
"He fled to Bombay!"
Stop the rumors! Stop the taunts! Stop it! Stop it!

What the hell?
Is it seriously the play?
Seems like just yesterday,
"Rich melted his head!"

"This is too good for a **** school play!"
"They've all been SQUIP'd..."
"Am I bi...?"
"How bad are the rumors?"
"Michael, here to save the day!"

Find the Red.
Luckily he's so old school
Drinks discontinued drinks...!
"Michael!"

Voices are gone...?
How could that be?
"Hey Christine?"
"Lunch, just you and me?"

That is the end,
Of this happy tale.
Now finally,
They're all living free.