I took my aching heart for a walk up on the moor today.
Past the lily pond and wild flower meadow to where the sky opens up over the valley. Seduced by the teasing scent of coconut and honey from the blazing gorse smouldering in the sunshine, I take the grassy path strewn with violets and head up the hill.
This morning the sun woke me to a moment of bliss. A stillness so expansively sweet that even the clattering of the refuse trucks making their weekly collection caused but a tremor to pass through. It feels like the debris of the past has been spirited away in the night leaving me swept clean and naked to this moment that stretches it’s arms wide to embrace a new dawn.
Yesterday I was shaken awake to face my Passion. Surrendering to a swell of knowing rising within me like a tidal wave that drowned all remnants of security to leave me standing on the precipice and, once more, like the Fool, I step off.
Free falling to find my wings I soar over the valley of my past, eyeing the rocky depths below through which a silver river of tears cuts through the darkness. This torrent that flooded my heart and broke through its’ defences to leave a gaping, empty hole. Empty of dreams, illusions, the fantasies that conjured a make believe world in which I could pretend I was in control.
Softly I tread up the path, walking on shifting sands, everywhere new life is emerging from winter slumber. Ponies graze and grunt in the spring sunshine, mother and foal amble past connected by that invisible thread that connects heart and mind. The past no longer restrains me. I am free to run, headlong into my heart and fall completely, passionately, and blissfully in love with this tender, raw shoot rising within me and calling to me like a hungry new lover.
The longing for a passionate life in which each intimate moment connects me more deeply to my true Essence into which I die and am reborn over, and over into it’s ocean of emptiness and bliss.
I took my aching heart for a walk today and found a path to freedom.