I wish I was one of those
picturesque kind of beauties,
curved and carved and made
of porcelain and painted up
lovelier than any sunrise.
their hearts are pure and
gentle, elegance laced
into every single step.

my beauty is chaos, fueled
by the storm in my chest.
I'm graceless, built by rage
and concrete. I'm the greenish
hue of the sky just before
a tornado and I am the
aftermath, an unrooted
forest strewn across city streets.

sometimes I'm sorry
for the disaster I've hurtled
into your life and sometimes
I wish you'd thank me for
the landscapes I am forever
repainting. I am hell and
I am home and I cannot
undo my weaving. love me
anyway. love my carnage
and my ravaged heart.
I wish I was picturesque
but I will never condemn
the chaos in my blood.