An Amish elder named Mullet, And some of his ****** clan, bore hatred deep in their gullets for their Amish fellow man. ****** seemed out of the question, It’s rare among Amish, folks say, (It may be that a horse and a carriage doesn’t make for a quick getaway.) So Mullet and some of his minions Invented a new sort of crime: Shaving their bearded opponents one Amish man at a time. Losing one’s beard among Amish- A disgrace before God, it’s been said. Mullet spared no woman either choping the hair from their heads. His victims are speechless with anger, denuded of both beards and hair. Leave it to someone named “Mullet” To offend using a Barber’s chair. Mullet’s in Federal custody; charged with a crime, not a sin. He refuses to answer the charges By the hair of his chinny chin chin.