I held you tightly in my heart before I knew your name.
I wondered what you'd be like and if we would be the same.
I held you in my stomach as I lay in bed at night.
I felt for every kick and move and smiled in sheer delight!
I held you as you cooed and cried before you learned to crawl.
I held you when you had a bump or took a nasty fall.
I held you as we rocked at night and sang our many songs.
I held you as you walked to me the first time 3 steps long!
I held you when you'd had a fight or when someone was mean.
I held you after you'd been spanked for making quite a scene.
I held you as I prayed for you when you were feeling low.
I held you when you were mad at me because I had said no.
I held you when you let me – as you were growing tall.
I held you less with my arms back then than I had when you were small.
But I always held you in my heart, and on my lips in prayer.
That no matter where you moved or lived, I had you covered there.
When adult friends hurt your feelings I'd want to hold you then
I never saw you grown up – or just as another friend.
But you were always my little child – someone for me to guide
Someone to protect from this vicious world – within my arms to hide.
But something happened the other day that felt like quite a blow
The Lord told me my job was done and that I could let go.
That I could still pray daily for all your hearts to soar
And I could love you from afar and each day love you more.
But the holding on just has to stop – you have your own lives (this I know).
And so with love I write this to you – to tell you I'm letting go.