Waking up to loud voices in my ears,
Wild thoughts swimming in my head.
"Do it, do it!" the voices seem to shout in my ear.
I want to die but I also want to live.
I have cut my skin open and turned my blood into gifts for you and everyone else.
The air has been ****** out my lungs and into the mouths of those who begged for air.
My eyes are gone, they were taken to be used to see the good in everyone else but myself.
It's draining seeing my bones broken and used for tools to carve engravings.
My sacred place sitting in between my thighs being used as a rest stop for those to feed themselves until they are full
My heart being put together just to be broken apart like a puzzle.
At certain moments my feet are dragged to a place surrounded by water and I'm tempted to jump.
"Jump, why won't you jump?"
"**** yourself, why won't you do it yet!?"
The 30 pills all piled up in my stomach, my heart rate slowing down.
I pass out but soon I ******* wake up.
I let myself sink to the bottom of the pool, but someone saves me.
One bullet left in the gun, but its snatched away and the last bullet is wasted in the air.
30 more pills are separated into 15, a final effort to stop me.
It still hurts sometimes to feel the light healing scars on my neck from the cords.
Tears are permanently painted on my face.
Disconnected from the world
Disconnected from the human race
Disconnected from me.