He was far from perfect but he did feel better when he read his bible. He made many mistakes but learned from them, never letting history repeat itself. He had lost his job and prayed for a new one. He became humble after being beaten up. He had hurt people and been hurt on both sides of the burden. Lots of overthinking trying to make sense of things put it all into perspective; make sense of all these confusing emotions and thoughts. Asking questions hoping to find answers or find a solution to the problem. Many questions unanswered but gave into his faith and beliefs.  Years of being silent to prevent drama. Lost in books and writing still felt incomplete. He wanted to get lost in life be able to share his side tell his stories. A friend told him why are you holding back? You are honest most should value your opinion. Turns out the friend was wrong. He wanted to do all the things he set out to do. He felt life was in hold but he wanted to live and feel again. Instead of closed off and shut out not a way to live.