do you ever feel the way i feel?

do you ever stand six feet deep
in the messes you've created
wondering how the hell you're going to get out?

i sift through my past once a week,
flip the pages back ten at a time,
trying to pinpoint where exactly
i went wrong.

but that one page i seek
is strangely elusive. all i can tell,
magnifying glass gripped tightly in one hand
and a bottle of jack clasped in the other
is that i've ridden this downward spiral for too long now.

reaching out, i switch on the radio;
and that one song, it goes on and on.