she'll be sitting in her wheel chair
and speaks in the past tense daily
she'll let time fade without a care
and dwell on the if and the if only

she'll be awake or she'll be in a daze
she'll be dreaming of her yesteryears
and let repetitive echoes reveberates
and listening  holding back her tears

if she could just have her youth back
if she hadn't used words so callously
if she could find the means to retract
if she had apologized do it differently

if only she hadn't been so intoxicated
if only she could let him drive instead
if only he didn't have to go needlessly
if only her memories could be deleted
if only she hadn't forsaken her sanity