I've got an idea, that's just too weird to be real But, if we could get it to work, I'll let you in on the deal It's a way to fix things, that's as easy as pie When I say what it is, you'll just sit and cry You won't need a mechanic when the car goes to *** You won't need any makeup to cover that spot The roof has a leak, don't call for repairs The window is broke, act as though it's not there Your tooth hurts like crazy, no dentist to call Don't call a contractor for that crack in the wall The baby's still crying, leave the doctor alone The dog ate your homework, just throw him a bone The bank just got robbed, don't call for the cops Don't sit there just waiting for the next shoe to drop The answer is simple, you won't believe it....I know But if we could get it to work, our wealth sure would grow It's a thing so **** simple, that we do in the loo I know that we do it, and I'm sure you do too It's a thing just as easy as lighting a candle to make problems go ****....just jiggle the handle ! If we could apply something this simple to our problems each day It would be so **** easy...and they'd go away So before you go crazy, overwhelmed with the world Just think of this answer that I have unfurled Remember it now...just like lighting a candle You can make them go ****...just jiggle the handle.