I was eating a T.V. dinner on the porch yesterday when a neighbor vomited on himself by accident in his car. I ran over to him to offer help. He told me that he was alright so I returned to my porch. Later, the neighbor's wife arrived home and commenced to ***** all over herself. Being inquisitive, I went to her. "I saw your husband puking all over himself earlier," I informed. "Yes," she said, while smearing puke everywhere. "It's our twenty-third wedding anniversary."