Physically And chemically Addicted is One thing. Being mentally Addicted Is Another. I'm A Smart Girl. Unfortunally I'm clever For what's opposite of Good. I've been Addicted Chemically. So Hooked I felt I Needed to Get High To continue Breathing. I needed A fix everyday To function in life. I've been addicticted Emotionally. Every time I Felt Some sort of sadness. I needed to Take A hit or do A line. I didn't want to deal with my problems or feel Upsetting emotions. Ive been Addicted Physically. I Was Inlove With the routine of Fixing A Line. I Was obsessed With Packing, lighting , Melting and hitting the pookie. It all amazed me and I was stuck on The routine. Im Currently Addicted mentally. I consider this To Be the worsest thing. You see I've been Sober. My minds constantly Reminding It's self About the good times. I'm Always Coming across Things that Remind me of getting high. When I'm Unhappy, Thinking of dope gets me happy. It's insane. To Conpletly Stop This horrific cycle I must Work On Forgetting About It . Need to learn not to reminisce.
I've Relapsed. All due To my mentality. It's clever ways Have made its sources To my Brain. It Plans Scenerios Before it Plays