#1 *******, i am really drunk accidentally slammed three beers pretending that the neck of the bottle was your lips
#2 part of me wanted to text you staring up into the sky praying that the stars would swallow me and my fingers itched to type out so many things that i would regret in the morning
#3 and i imagined telling you confessions of how i felt and i imagined that little cursor blinking back at me like so much apathy and words swallowed over and again
#4 and i have kissed my fair share of people with lips male and female with faces smooth and some scruff or a full beard that i envied but girls have the softest lips always have
#5 i wondered what it would be like to kiss you then holding your body to mine hoping you would forgive the splits in my lip that anxiety helped me put there
#6 a good describing word for how i felt then with three beers and good food making its home in my belly would be “blissed” i was blissed out on ***** and food and my pining for you
#7 i am sober now woke up earlier than i would have liked but then again i fell asleep at 10:30pm
#8 and this thing i feel it’s like a combination of regret and disappointment in myself for not just telling you how i feel and for needing liquid courage to get myself to that plateau of spilling my guts or backing away
#9 and i have forgotten what my favorite drink tastes like again in favor of the words to describe how kissing you for the first time would surely feel
#10 and i have never felt fireworks when kissing someone before even the girl i thought i was gonna marry and i’m not so young now and a little bit more cynical but i wanna feel those fireworks with you and i still haven’t texted you and i don’t know if i will and i don’t know if i should and i am sorry for being like this