(with Fred F. Fallopian)
The moon is much closer than the government says. The government's closer than the moon too. [I don't want to be with you for the rest of your life because you might live a long time.]
  
He fondled my 18-year-old, hot body with his old, cold hands as he exerted senior-citizen influence upon my virginal, unsold glands. Your thighs are chubby & your fingers are stubby. You sprained your neck in a recent car wreck. You suffer angina down to your ******. On your breast sits 2 cherry-red *******. You beat me with a rusty crow bar after running me over with your car. I sustained horrifical injuries to my face before you sprayed my eyes with mace. Your beautiful smile really got me before you pulled a gun and shot me. Our passion-charged love begins in the **** line of your crack, extending north from your lard *** to the middle of your back. Your really stupid life is so miserable and I know that I shouldn't blame you for committing suicide now because I really couldn't. No scalpels below the belly button or above the chin because with surgeons, that's the only way you can win.