I'm trying to learn how to stop hating myself
so that maybe
one day
I might even learn how to love myself

I think about the good things I have done
and try to understand the circumstances behind
all the not-so-good things I have said and done.

I think of the beautiful women
who maybe understand me better
than I understand myself

H is quitting a job she doesn't hate
because her boss told her that
she has to wear a god ****** bra
--I love her for her conviction
--she loves me, too, for some reason

A has got these voices in her head
and they're mad at her for being too busy this weekend to get ******.
--I love her for her tenacity
--she loves me, too, for some reason

M is off to Mexico
excited and afraid to pursue her dreams
instead of just talking about them
--I love her for her ambition
--she loves me, too, for some reason

If my love is reciprocated
by the three most beautiful women
I have ever had the pleasure of loving
perhaps I should find some way
to hate myself less
if only so
I can
love them more.