Tonight is the first night in a year
that I will be going to bed alone
I don't want to but I have to
My body aches as I remind myself that you won't be here
to wrap your arms around me anymore
I feel cold as I lie here wishing I could feel your breathing
dancing with mine
My face burns from tears that can't seem to stop
What hurts the most is knowing you are probably at home
not missing me at all
I've been in love with you for five years
I never in my wildest dreams
thought I would have a shot with you
Finding out that you liked me back
I was so ecstatic
I think about that day and my heart still goes crazy
It stings looking over to my side and not seeing you there
I can't even put into words how sad I feel
I've had my heart broken before and have felt pain like this
but this feels different
This pain I feel is deeper
It's stronger
I have no doubts about my love for you
My love for you is so strong
My love for you is pure
My love for you is a love that I haven't felt for anyone else
I've loved other men before in previous relationships
yet I never missed them as much as I miss you
I thought I knew heartbreak
I thought I had experienced true love
but I think I was wrong
With you I saw a future
I've never seen the future with anybody else
I was with you because I wanted to be
not because I was lonely
Everything about you still gives me butterflies
It hurts to breathe
It hurts to eat
It hurts to laugh
The thought of us not being together anymore hurts too much
I know we agreed on giving each other space
but what if that space means the end?
I don't know how to deal with that possibility
I'm going to try to sleep now
My face hurts from crying
but I've stopped trying to stop the tears
I really hope we can work things out
We've come too far for it to end like this