grazing long hours
in a maze

I run

just to chew the fat

from a missing piece

of understanding

that fits

in the

crystal blue room

of your sky.
  
  she opens the door
  night after night

checking to see if someone is there

arrows rapid fire from her belligerent mouth

they stick to anything male

wears her denial like a crown

but the love of her life killed himself when she was 19

she never told my half brother
how his dad died until high school.

it's complicated

stop asking me ******* questions

I don't have all the answers.

all I know is that moment changed everything

You have no idea

neither do I

why black rain puddles
to drown dreams

or how tentacles slither out
from all the cracks that never heal

impact like a meteor

dents so wide
they'll swallow your whole family

and cruel fire will speak
  from the missing pieces
   of love

to teach you how to forgive
or to become another lunatic
driven by rage.

I have smiled at both your faces and earned my right to graze in the meadows of tears and fire,

after this
only
wisdom
will walk with a limp.