No one understands you because you imagine you are better
                    Than all the others
                                When your feast is served you share nothing

2. You are hungry yet you have eaten fully
                        You stumble
                                The wine is so heavy in your belly
3. The people walk the empty streets
     Crowded

    Sitting in waiting rooms
     Coughing
    
    Standing in line
(You look into crowds of empty eyes)

4. The cuts on your wrist are silent
                          (Yet you speak incessantly of them
                             As of they are your children)
      The cuts on your legs are silent
                            (Easier to hide these cuts
                                      Not so bright red against the pale backdrop of your arm)

5. Your hair is long
        The day is cold and wind cursed
            You press at the hem of your skirt

6. The place once called home is still there
     Somehow different
        Quieter -
        Everyone is awake
         Gone                               Somewhere they make sound and love to the sky

              unstable

7. You sleep but you find no rest
     You awaken but you still feel like you are sleeping
   The dreams turn to nightmares
Flashbacks/memories of things once loved now hated
Things once pure are now full of lies
         (The radio crackles as you search for the station)

8. You cover yourself in clothes
     You think silly thoughts
"I'm alive! I matter!"

9. You want to believe
     You want to have the faith of a child
              But children don't see the things you've seen
             You feel the barb of pain
                     Throbbing in your ribs

10. Your mind is now your greatest enemy
         It tells you
     Love.     The flamiliar heat of wonder
                    You squeeze your thighs together
Hate.        The lonliness that comes
                   When the heat dies



        You lie on your bed
       Unable to defeat the enemy of self
     You lie awake
      Praying but none listen
You whisper thoughts of longing    your flesh alone against the sheets