I search for answers
in others eyes
in poetry
and lyrical salvation

You're in all of them
my muse, my idiotic refuge
I feel alive even thinking about your skin
your simple movement
the way you curl your fingers around my hair

I come home
away from my toxic trembling addiction
I step into my platonic robotic role
pick up arm
put around husband
smile
keep going
somehow

if my time was inscripted
love letters to you would shock
this world I've created so innocently
for myself

this world of longing
and an empty stream of foreign trash
unnatural being

I am that stream