I'm counting each breath I learn how to take.
It seems like they freeze right in front of my face.
Harden there like a mask to constrict my flow
Form into a shell of me until we are standing toe to toe.

My efforts, my words which have come to define me
Standing here in front, now surely looking to confine me.
Shes such a beautiful girl, I don't know why she'd defy me.
But just because she looks like me doesn't really imply me.

I had this dream the other night, standing by a mirror
I thought i caught a glimpse of some one, but then it got clearer.
It was me all coked up skinny and sad
begging for a fix but i said to bad.
She was therein the flesh not a reflection anymore
Begging and pleading picking at sores.
I couldn't take it so i shoved her to the floor.
I could beat her down, but i reach for the door.

She started to scream "but it feels so good i need it now"
I turned and ran looking for a way out.
Its my child hood home, kitchen and sink
The smell of the dead causes it to stink.
A past that haunts me, more than any ghost.
A past that has claimed my mind as its host.