Staying up late
Surviving the flashing memories of you in my head
I bust from sleep in a cold sweat
"I betcha she'd love to see this agony" I've heard myself say
A cold bet
To wage on a jackpot I'm unsure of what it should be
Love?
Passion?
Payback for heartbreak?
"No! For heaven's sake!"
I want to just hold her and cry in her arms.

"I miss you!"
To have her see me weak is part of the disease of "manly pride"
In this case, the emotions I hide.

Shivering back to sleep.
I act "bullet proof"
I'm sure she knows the truth.

"Inside, he's a scared and broken youth."