Ma'am
A Nuns Story
By
Jude  Kyrie
Ma’am
By |Jude Kyrie

I remember the first time I met her
It was at the orphanage.
So many many years ago
I was going through rehabilitation
after running away again
for what turned out to be last of many times
I was a life that's for certain.
Who wants to adopt fourteen-year-old boys?
Apparently no one.
She was assigned as my counselor
I don't think I have ever seen anyone as beautiful as her.
before or since.
Her lovely angelic face.
Oh! and her smile, it was like sunshine.
Unsure of how to address a Nun
I always called her Ma’am.
She did not seem to mind.
Her heart was full of kindness I was hooked.
I think that was when I realized she was the only friend I had.
What I did not know was I was falling in love with her.
That confusing rite of passage
from Boyhood to Manhood left me dazed and confused.
Or perhaps I just needed someone of my own to love.
I have never seen as much kindness before or since.
It flowed from her like golden honey.

She stopped me from running away again,
and taught me how to read books, great books, by important authors.
To learn poetry and to talk about its meaning.
At this point I knew for sure I loved her.
She took me to the mission where the homeless lived
and we served in the free kitchen.
I would have followed her to the moon or anywhere.

She was relocated after a couple of years.
To a mission in Africa.
I was desolate.
Begging to go with her.
I even asked her to marry me.
She smiled and said if she was free
she would marry me in a heartbeat.
But she explained gently to my young
heart. that she was already married to her faith.
Showing me her gold ring.
She whispered see I am a bride of Christ.

She died a few years later
her letters stopped coming
It was a bout of malaria that took her.
Now when I feel alone or sad.
I open an old shoe box the only thing
that I kept from the orphanage.
And I re-read her stacks of letters.
one by one.
Always in the order that she sent them to me.
you know for a moment
the world becomes sweeter.
And as usual
I feel warm and safe again.