Abstract tears bring melancholy rain
Concrete fears and whitewashed pain.
I sit perched upon my precipice
Teetering and testing tinctures of tumultuous joy and overwhelming sorrow,
Looking back at yesterday and forward to tomorrow,
Tentatively trying to find my balance.

The idea of tomorrow surrendered forever ago as the options narrowed;
Continue forward, carefully planning each step, measuring it down to the quark, exhausting myself with the weight of a thousand heartaches and broken dreams, tearing myself apart at the seams
Tearing myself apart as it seems that no matter how many steps I take, and no matter how many times I break,
I'll never get where I'm meant to be.
There are no longer options two, or three. All I know is to go forward.

And yesterday seems so far away, as the images unfold in my mind;
Tick tock things unwind
Click the lock, "you'll be fine"
Smash the clock as time rewinds
I resign and rescind my thoughts;
I don't like looking back.

And memories last longer than bruises,
But just because someone else wins,
Doesn't mean everyone else loses.
A battle fought is a lesson learned
A lesson taught by those who've earned
The knowledge that won them that battle.
But not the war
Lost in the worlds of after and before
I slip and as the world rushes towards
My hands catch the edge
And I look not up, not down, but I look around.

I am greeted by a multitude of sheer drops and cliff faces
Tightrope walks and narrow spaces
By people around confronting their fears
Abstract pains and concrete tears;
The burden I bear and the weight of my steps
Is a reflection I share with every breath
Mirrored in the world around me...

And so my message to all of you battle-scarred
Benevolent beautiful badass bards:
Pull yourself back up
And try again.