Do you hear this heart thumping? Sounds normal, doesn't it? Sounds like a healthy and steady heart. But there's death in it. Sometimes too much blood pumps in it. It regurgitates back into itself, fills it with too much blood and it stresses to pump it all out in time. So if you're lucky, you might hear it do a big thump followed by rapid thumps. Then back to normal. Normal... I thought it was normal until recently. Now I know it could be fatal and there's nothing I can do about it. It could enlarge my heart over time, or it could pop like a balloon. Or I can live to be a hundred; it's in God's hands. It never hurts, but it does feel weird. Like one of those rubber toys filled with water, and you squeeze one end of it. Feels like that for only a second. I'm okay with the possibility of dying. Just know if I do, I loved you all as much as I could. Don't cry for me.
Written 11 February 2016... shortly after learning I have heart murmurs.