What if I told you I have a monster within?
What if I showed you the dark side of my soul?

I have PTSD, but never been overseas
All came from some fights between mom and dad
Whenever someone yells, I still look to hide.
I've even shut down so far I could ****.

When I was 17, a ******, I got *****
Yeah, most wouldn't call it that
But she took advantage of me
Preyed on my feelings when I wasn't ready.

That unleashed a terrible monster in me
Always craving a new woman to sleep with.
I honestly don't know how many women I've been with.
After a while, they all seem the same.
Three years of unchecked debauchery and lust.

And there's some women in there I played.
Used their vulnerable heart to get what I want.
Just like I was played at 17...
How many broken hearts did I leave behind?

I'm skilled at the art of deception
And I know how to please a woman
So my addiction never stopped.
Not until recently.

I started to write, hadn't done it much before.
Didn't really think about what I was writing
But seeing myself in black and white I saw...
I needed to get better, and God gave me an answer.

I may be on my way to better days
But this needed to be told.
I'm not a good man
But I try my best to be, now.