bags under my eyes
so purple and dark
(i haven't slept well in weeks)
my face
never showing the ocean inside
unlike my eyes
that show everything.
picking my fingers
to the bone.
(they don't even bleed anymore)
biting my nails
until they bleed.
my hands
cracked and dry,
****** knuckles
that never heal.
my spine
is exhausted
from holding this weight.
my shoulders
and neck
can hardly hold my head.

i just want to lay in a bed of flowers,
under the shade of a tree
so that i may rest my head.
i don't want a tumultuous ocean inside,
i want calm seas.