I found you, I found you in the midst of all my darkness where only the thought of ever finding meaningful love again resided. You gave me life, breathed it into my very soul and made it so the hole I had within me subsided. Your words gave hope, your hand gave warmth, your eyes gave wisdom but your heart never gave. I never had you from the very beginning, the illusion I had was fallacious yet I still have aspirations of your love and our empire for without my king my reign is meaningless. I will never sleep without you in my dreams, I will never ponder without you in my thoughts, I will never love without you in my heart. I gave you all, not much left to give, so now it's time I figure how to live. Now it's time I learn yet another lesson, one that has been the most pain filled. What is there to rebuild when my foundation has broken into thousands of pebbles, will my insides ever be fulfilled?
You were my truth, you were my justice in the world that's cold and broken you were my peace. I gave you too much, I gave you my soul that wasn't mine to give. I gave you my breath while I drowned and you never noticed. My intention was to keep you afloat, away from hurt, away from evil and away from sadness. I'm left standing still, I'm left to sink, to bear a burden of the forever I promised in silence and alone. The love I bear for you that burns has turned my warm heart to stone.
In gathering my ultimate fear of losing you, I face this more afraid than I've ever been, for the growing emotions inside me of thinking forward to a future that you may not be is not a future I wish to dwell. Hopes that flush away I bring back for looking into your eyes motivates me to try and try and try more. By your side I will be, hoping, praying, and waiting until the time you seek is found.