At five a.m. the doors swing open. The throng of shoppers lined up at the store Pushes and shoves and jabs and elbows Its aggressive way through the wide-open door.
Once inside, the crowd scatters This way, that way, in chaotic motion. The store clerks gasp, feeling like islands Surrounded by a raging ocean.
"Oh, no you don’t!" one woman shouts At another woman clutching a box Containing the last flat-screen TV. "Hands off; it's mine!" the other one squawks.
A mad tug-o'-war ensues As the two women grapple to claim what's theirs. An onlooker who is knocked down in the skirmish Shrieks, "What a sorry state of affairs!"
Everywhere you look, items are flying. The store resembles the scene of a battle, OR, perhaps, a giant herd Of loud, thundering, angry cattle.
A man stops to pick up a bottle Of perfume that he dropped--a gift for his wife-- And is trampled by the surge of shoppers. The poor guy nearly loses his life.
One bold shopper with her canister of pepper spray Threatens to douse the belligerent crowd Until she is tackled by security guards And is escorted away, cursing out loud.
Announcements blare from the loudspeakers: "Shoppers' special on aisle three." Suddenly, the rivers of shoppers change course As the curious hope to get something free.
In the background, Christmas carols playing The hopeful messages of joy and peace Are drowned out by the ear-piercing din That sounds like the honking of thousands of geese.
"I want my mommy," a whiny child cries. "What do you want for Christmas: a dolly?" Asks Santa, losing his last bit of patience And doing his best to try to act jolly.
The chaos never ceases to wane As the shoppers vie for the best shopping deals. One man rushing to grab the last smart phone Slips and falls head over heels
And slides into an obese grandma, Sending her sprawling into some shelves Of decorations, which all go flying. The injured lie covered with reindeer and elves.
Interminable lines at the registers await The exhausted shoppers. You get closer; hurrah! The woman in front of you then needs a price check! No, that can't be! That's the last straw!
Another day of Black Friday madness. Would that it could be over! But no. You've barely started; that's store number one. You have four more stores to go!