I usually fall asleep with the light on Because in the morning it seems like the darkness never came My body is a perpetual light switch Always swept up in a rapid shift from darkness to florescence Giving someone like me mania after long spells of depression Is like giving an alcoholic a shot of whiskey I need it to feel like I am worth something I need it to feel like I can get anything done Why did God, whoever the hell they are, Decide I needed the super power Of dragging myself out of the pit of my bed Only to be blindsided with some sort of dangerous drug See, most of the time I only reach an abridged version of that mania But when it peaks it is just that: Dangerous It is my favorite brand of tequila And the last drag of a cigarette The one where the backlog from the filter gets lost in your throat But it keeps you buzzed for a while You see, mania sends you spinning A trip only a certain kind of acid can take you on You are constantly carnival With lights and sound and fire That no one can calm down You are never quite at home in your body Which might be why others can make it theirs so easily Most days you binge on ***** and **** and *** Are manic days Manic depression is like losing control of the car And other days, forgetting how to drive Mania is like **** You don't need to sleep when it's got you Mania after depression is an abusive lover who knew you were coming home Knew you would be back for more It was only a matter of time Before you collapsed into their arms