The empty expanses of echoing thought
My mind quaking and shaking and break-
-ing
How can one say this is innocuous teenage angst?
These lines only express to the power of the words I know how to put in them
My world is abuzz with a cacophony of noises
Each one of them violently wrenching me out
Out of this calm I made for myself
Out of the focused escapism I constructed here
Out of the menial meandering monotonous tasks
A blow to my skull all at once
I sit dazed and unfocused once again
All the senses overwhelmed once again
My head spinning, tornado, once again
I try to wrench myself back but they’ve cut the string
I’m left here ‘til the next time
The next time it all fades away
The next time it all makes sense
The next time i'm one of them
If only for a fleeting bit of time
If only for a single task completed
If only for a moment’s respite
To be like one of them is to be half myself
But in their world half myself is twice myself
Can I ever hope to understand why they desire to live as if nothing is happening?
To be like one of them is to be someone else
To be like one of them is to be enough
And yet to be like one of them is to give up
So much of myself denies the desire to be like them, and so much of me wants nothing more.