I got caught in-between
An argument about tv
An engaged couple, she’s got a big rock on her finger
I giggled and giggled at my large sunday
I didn’t wear a bra all day
My thin limbs, mama point out the bones around my collarbone
Papa and I sit side by side, we get our work done
Everything so material here
Everything so flashy and fried here
I rode in the back of the pick up truck
Absorbed the quarter moon, my mama called it
“Can’t you put that away and just relax?”

I left my phone in my room all day
Its so good to escape
But it lasts for only so long
One of my best friends, she severs her love
Lost it to drugs
And a man that would rather get high
Than choose her.

Its a choice we have
To actively choose each other
I sit as a witness
To cute arguments about what tv show they prefer to watch
Or how a certain kind of ice-cream is so __’s ”thing”
And its adorable to watch
My eyes don’t roll, I’m supportive
As my mother tries to marry me off jokingly to the guitarist on television
For the first time in my life
I don’t look. I don’t hunt. I don’t search.
I just exist with as much as I’ve currently got.

Because I know.