Dear dad,
I want you to hear me.
I want you to see me,
I want you to know.
I want you to know how sick I am.
How rolling out of bed is too overwhelming,
How I fake a smile to keep you from my burdens.
I care too much to let you see whats really inside.
The anger, the resentment, the never-ending sadness...
You look and see a person,
You look and see me as you're most important work.
Your daughter...
I look in the mirror, and see shallow eyes and a heavy chest.
I want you to know,
I will always love you.
But I envy you.
To you, there is more light than dark,
There is more good than bad.
I envy you don't have to battle your mind on a 24/7 basis,
You see, theres nothing but walls surrounding my head,
letting no-one in, and not letting me out.
Its dark here, and the light is out of reach...
Its depression and anxiety... have my on my knees.