I look forward to the day i can look back on this and smile. Smile like i used to. I see myself in those photographs and i can't help but notice that i don't look, or feel, the same.  The roses are gone, along with the wrinkles and flames. And i feel flat; Like a paper person. Every step i take and every move i make i am worried about tearing. "It could tear me, he could tear me, this could tear me." I can't do anything anymore without thinking, "is this gonna hurt me?" And that's because the thing i never thought would bring any harm to me, did. He did. And he brought a lot of it. I've lost the person i was in loving him. In the pain, in the joy, in the passion. I look forward to the day i find her (me). I look forward to the day the roses return to my cheeks, as well as the wrinkles to my nose and the flames to my eyes. And i can look back on this, and smile.