Dear dad,
I know I'm not the daughter you wanted,
But who knows?
Sometimes it feels like it's been
forever,
Sometimes it feels like you're still
here
I love you, I know I never said that enough,
I know I'll never get to say it again.
I love you.
I miss hugging you, I miss struggling to keep up with you.
I miss not understanding your speeches.
Fearing you, as I still fear, what you'd have to say
About, and to me now.
I love you anyway.
I wish I could be with you, to put off fireworks, like we used to.
There are so many stories unwritten and so many arcs retconned,
Since you died, my life took a different turn,
Than wherever I was headed, with you alive.
Some years I do better than others,
But this year I'm falling apart.
The 4th will someday be the best memory, and the best day to celebrate
Your life, and all the 4ths we spent together.
Until that day, the 4th is a day without light.
Goodnight, oh, but never goodbye.