someone once said to walk away from that which no longer makes you happy*

I have lived my life
Obeying this wisdom
And I rarely miss
Those I walked away from.
Not because I stopped loving them
Not necessarily because I don't care
But I lost my attachment
Willingly and gracefully
And send them all the best
And hoped they would do well
For themselves.

But what about those few
Who never leave you
No matter how far you ran.
No matter how angry you were
Or how many reasons you had
To stay angry.
I've left situations that
I thought I would never dismiss.
Never looking back
Knowing I just did the impossible.
But what about those few
Who show up in my dreams
Greet my thoughts
First thing in the morning
And haunt me through out the day
Having less than enough reason
To stay in my mind?

What do you still have
To say for yourself?
Is it just that I never should've left
In the first place?
Is it a lesson the same way I teach them?
fine if you believe it to be true, let's test it
Am I now getting a taste of my own medicine?
If I truly believed I could just run off
And really leave it all behind me
As just a bad taste in my mouth?
The lesson being
That if I truly belief it to be true,
It must be tested.
And the universe threw all it's power on me
And gently caught me
As I caved under the pressure
Of my own stubborness.

What's there left to say now?
I can reason what I did perfectly.
It all makes sense.
I had no business in that business.
Except for your gracefull existance.
I had to follow my potential
Which is ironically going to waste
As I'm still not living up to it.
I had no space to co-exist in your life
Nor was it my place
I was just the maid
But ironically you still exist in mine.
And no matter how much
I wish you'd leave my
My mind, my dreams,
No matter how much I wish
To stop feeling that sensation
That turns in to an image of you,
It never ends.

*so please, just tell me what you came for. I'm tired of fighting, you won. Just tell me and I'll give in; just make this stop