There is this fish who shares my office
I feed him and he has certain rules:
No noisy exchanges with the crab,
(the crab is territorial so this must be hard for the fish)
No staring at me, though I can stare at him,
and above all
No criticism of what I do.

He is my friend because he does these things perfectly

My other friends are mostly human
My best friend is a woman who married me
They are not like the fish, which gives me trouble sometimes
I give them trouble too, I think,
But it usually works out.

When it doesn't, I always have the fish
And if he's too busy, there is the plant in the corner
Who has stood by me for years.