Scrunched down a little,
puckered around the eyes,
tuckered looking,
but long in the leg
and his hands were steady

He'd get mean, so mean
he'd even slap a woman
if she was a lookin' for it
But those were the times,
They was rough 'n ready

He smoked
He drank
He cussed
He spit
and he hated liberals

Some say he punched a horse,
and some say that was Eastwood
He'd kick Eastwood's *** and hand it to him
then pick up his hat and hand it to him
then go buy him a couple of shots

I would like to have met "The Duke"
though we'd probably not have gotten along
Tough guys are never what they seem, to me
He died and many good folks wept
They said America lost its last Hero

But Heroes come back
and some are non-smokers
and some don't drink or cuss or spit
And some even take things in their
Behind