With a runny nose
Shaking hands
And unsure thoughts
I got on my knees
And begged

Not with words
Or
With tears
But with my lips
And my tongue

His **** filling my mouth
His hand forcing my head
Eyes closed
I could feel his body tremble
Smell his sweat

A few heavy thrusts
Followed by even heavier gags
He grabbed my hand
Helped me up
And slipped a reward into my coat pocket

'... this is the last time'
I whispered

'You always say that'

The walk home seemed to last years
Prolonged by feelings of disgust
I could feel the people
Of the city streets
Silently judging me

I locked myself in the bathroom
Cut the fattest line
My body could handle
And snorted away my
Shame