I hate this sick to my stomach
feeling that I carry with me everywhere now.
I was just saying,
what scares me most is not knowing where to go if I lose this job.
I've been really regretting
failing out of school,
because my future is completely
unpredictable.
I know it's not official,
but I feel it's inevitable.
I have never worked so hard,
wanted so hard,
to keep a job.
And to think that all of this was for nothing,
is almost too depressing to breathe.
Why is it never me?
Why do I fail at everything I attempt?
When will it be me?