Loving myself comes with the rain

Sometimes a drizzle
Sometimes a thunderstorm
Sometimes it’s a fog, consuming my insecurities
Making them hard to see

This love that I have for myself
Is not something constant

It is changing with the weather

Sometimes there is most certainly a drought

A choking, overwhelming feeling
When I realize there’s no water

Nothing there
There will continue to be nothing
Because I am nothing

There is nothing I can do to change the fact
That nothing will come

And that’s when it does

A big, rumbling rain storm
Heading straight for me

It overflows the gutters of my mind
It floods my heart with a love
A love for myself

And it feels like the rain will never end
Nothing could stop it
Because it is everything

I am everything

But it is gone as suddenly as it came

And I am stuck in this cycle
Of loving
And hating

I wish you nothing but endless rainy days