4 pm: I miss you so much that it hurts and I wonder if this ever goes away

7 pm: I couldnt eat dinner because the thought of you made me feel sick

11 pm: Im laying in bed and I already know my 11:11 wish will be for you to be entangled in my bedsheets and my arms, breathing slowly next to me

12 pm: Im sitting on the roof and its snowing and the first time you told me you loved me it was snowing, and so the biting wind isnt quite as cold as my attitude

1 am: Im sorry Im such a **** up, you probably never even wanted me in the first place, but of course you ended up with just me

3 am: Im crying into a bowl of cereal and I feel so pathetic because you never loved me but I believed you and I hate myself for that

5 am: The sun is rising outside my window and I keep thinking about the time we stayed up together playing 20 questions and watching the sky fade from the brilliant gold in your hair to the brightest pink in your cheeks to the crystal blue in your eyes

6 am: I dont feel anything. Im not capable of forming thoughts because the only thing I can focus on is the blank space of the wall, as I stare endlessly, hoping to lose myself in the solid space that lays before my eyes.