Sometimes i wonder who you would have been, would you have led the world out of darkness or lived a life of sin, your death was paid for before your life even had a chance to begin, not a day goes by where you don't cross my mind, searching for sanity knowing that its something i will never find, don't you know i left so much of myself behind, not a second thought as i continued to climb, closed my eyes as i crossed that line, slowly tearing myself apart over time, you would lose it all with a single glance at this mind of mine, sanity is something i haven't known for almost ten years, looking around at the addicts and madmen that are my peers, bloodshot eyes leaking tears, believe me i understand why this addiction has become one of their biggest fears, at sixteen i started living life according to those Tripp laws, devoted my life to that beast without pause, praying i didn't meet its claws, young and reckless living with no real cause, how can i look to the future when i can't even see past my own flaws, **** i remember when this trip **** was just a weekend habit, but at the first sign of trouble i just had to have it, watched my sanity slowly slip away but these helpless arms just couldn't grab it, i used to pray for death every single night, figured it would be easier than that approaching fight, leading a life of sin death only seemed right, went right back to the darkness after i saw that light, lost all hope of changing my life, caught my reflection just the other night, **** that was such a sad sight, looking into dull gray eyes wondering when they stopped being so **** bright, why is death such a familiar sight, why aren't you here by my side tonight..