For as long as I could remember
I have never wanted to grow so old
That I could not get out of my bed on my own,
Take a **** and wipe my *** on my own—
Nor would I ever want to be stowed away
In some **** ***,
**** smelling,
Convalescent slash retirement home—
I have seen how those ******* places
Absorb the remainder of the faith left in your hope far too many times.
To be restricted to this "new home" away from home
Only a spec of the man I once was
With some nurse feeding me pills
and halfhearted advice about how I might live a little bit longer
If I stop doing all that I loved up until this moment—
I say simply,
If I was ever such a nuisance to my own family
I am certain I would prefer someone to end me swiftly—
I've heard a morphine drip is quite inexpensive these days.
And as for a burial send my ashes into an October breeze
to be scattered over its delicate leaves
And through death
I shall reprieve.