Projections of lights, original paintings
I dropped my drink on the dance floor
On the girl I just met shoes
One after the other the new men
That have come through
Seem to trickle and wink at me
Through my camera lens.

I didn't look for you in the shadows of
The moment we all mark: A New Beginning
I don't know what it really is that I seek from you now
But I know, I know
You've got your own demons
As a multitude reassures me how wrong
You just were, for both of us.

My eyes hurt
The house was lonely and quiet today
As my heart can't help but long
For some kind stability with you
But I only reach my arms out so far
Preparing myself to be braver
Than I have ever been before.

I just wanna smoke ****, kiss
Listen to some amazing music
Like blue green eyes opened next to me this morning
As I waved farewell to 2015
And yet, I still glance through mirrors
Crevices in hidden places
To try and save whatever it was we were.

So much at stake
But I know I could always just walk away
I know none of you would ever want that.

Beautiful tattoos, my kind of language
A free for all bar
I felt so glad, so content
Running around with the most
Beautiful women
Arm in arm, beware what you don't want.

You just texted me back.
Your texts so mundane, with so little color
I wish I didn't feel like I needed
I needed
In my darkest and most memorable moments
You handled me terribly.

And thats the underlying, echoing
Truth of it all.
I don't reply.
I don't text back.
"We are fine. No worries"

If I could pull the plug
On my memory of you
I would.

Two men competed for my attention last night
At the same time
Who will be the one to take her home?
I thought of you so little.
So little.
So little.
My friends are right
My mother is right
Thats what you and your mind
Are.
Little.