Hot green tea
Lemons, bitter lemons in ******* everything
I talk and circle around myself
Avoiding distracting insomnia driving
Smoke clouds tonight.
My hands and finger tips sometimes
Late into the night
Or early in the morning
As if puppeteered by something
Stronger and more colossal than myself
I slice the strings with my bare teeth.

Sitting and gazing at the glorious southern sky
I spend too much money
Feeling like a modern day Blanche DuBois
My hair is so ******* blonde.

Lets discuss drugs and just how they will infect our veins
A big thought when inspecting a dead possum
Play possum in our front yard tonight
Little brother donned surgical gloves, a trash bag
Mama geared him up right
Its got rabies, everyone chimed
As I sat in silence in the kitchen
Stuffing chicken and too buttered for my taste
Broccoli in my face, come look at it, come look at it
Its so dead
I refused, eating with nothing but the TV
Warning of severe winter storms
And a mending heart
Staying away from what you should allow to be the past
On the news.

I wanna be thinner
Stronger
Braver
My hair longer
I wanna be invincible
I want to be able to see you in the room
And not give a flying ****.

But lets face it, Zak.
Our hearts will pound a little harder
We will drink a little bit more of whatever is in our hands
As we avoid and dodge thoughts
New Years Eve approaching
I place my phone back on my desk
To do just that.

Writing, so painfully seeing our story
My story with so many
Becoming fully realized
But how beautiful, how freeing
As I stood on that playground cage
My arms stretched out
I knew none of this would be easy

Looking and storming through an army of wrong faces
I painted the doorway of my art studio, so young
I saw it again for the first time today
In what seems like eons
I knew exactly what it meant.